Women Leading Together - Helping Women Create Fulfilling Careers
Volume III Issue 6 • July 23, 2015

Note from Susan

During August I like to take a break and spend some time on renewal of mind, body, spirit and business. I attend an annual leadership conference, I take a few days away to reset my “self-care odometer” and I spend some time thinking strategically about my business and about my personal development journey. It’s a good time to plan for the rest of the year and to refresh myself for the busy months ahead.

For many of you, the coming months will have you completing this year’s goals and ramping up for annual performance reviews. This month I write about “asking for what we want” – a skill that is hard for many women. Yet it’s critical, especially at the time of year when raises, bonuses and promotions are decided.

Take time now to plan and prepare yourself for the annual review season by developing skills that will help you be recognized for your work. Creating Your Career Opportunities™ virtual program is a great way to get you ready. I still have a few spots open for the fall program. Contact me for more info at seminars@WomenLeadingTogether.com or register here to prepare yourself to be recognized!

Warm Regards,

Susan

Feature Article

Can You Get What You Want?

I recently watched the 1994 movie “The Paper”. In a sub-plot of the movie, Glen Close plays a frustrated Managing Editor in financial straits who wants a raise. As I watched I was frustrated that the movie depicted a strong woman in a senior position showing up looking weak. Unfortunately, the script was all too real in depicting the mistakes that many women make when asking for what they want in business.

Glen’s character first approaches her immediate boss and makes an emotional appeal based on her financial need. What she gets is advice on how to cut back on her extravagant lifestyle. No raise.

She then escalates to the most senior guy. After a hokey sexual appeal (I know…it’s the movies), she makes an attempt to “ask”. But she doesn’t actually ask for a raise. She tells him, “I have other offers.” This time she gets permission to pursue those offers and an admonishment for approaching him.

None of those strategies works…in the movies or in real life.

The Mistakes We Too Often Make 

The mistakes the character made (and that we too often make) were:

  • Letting emotions guide the request.
  • Giving an indirect suggestion of what is wanted.
  • Failing to make a business case for the request.
  • Not asking specifically.

There is a More Effective Way

In contrast I worked with a woman who got it right recently in my Creating Your Career Opportunities™ program. She was seeking recognition for her team’s efforts through a regular spot on the weekly management meeting agenda. It seemed like simple request, but it had been bothering her for some time. The annoyance was reinforced weekly as her team’s accomplishments (and hers) were overlooked while others received recognition in the meeting.

She had tried the “hinting” technique, even providing her boss with summary info on a weekly basis of her team’s accomplishments. But it went unread and unnoticed, exacerbating her frustration.

During the program she identified this as a request she wanted to use to practice what she was learning.

She strategically and intentionally applied the strategies and steps she was being coached on and approached her boss with the request.

  • She did her work to remove the emotions behind her request.
  • She clearly identified what she wanted to ask.
  • She developed a strategy that would work with her boss, considering a number of variables.
  • When it came time, she asked directly.

Here’s the kicker: After her boss agreed to put her on the weekly meeting agenda, she felt empowered and confident, knowing that she now has the skills to ask and have her business requests granted. The success of this simple request is having a lasting impact in how confident and in-control she feels in her job.

If you’re frustrated at your requests not being heard or if you’ve ever felt uncomfortable asking directly for what you want in your career, you will benefit from the Creating Your Career Opportunities™ program. Your success is my passion. Contact me at seminars@WomenLeadingTogether for more info or check out the webpage here.

Resource Corner

Pantheon of Women

Since we talked about how women are depicted in movies this month, check out Pantheon of Women. It’s a film company that supports women by telling really good stories in a positive way through film and television. They’re changing the way women are depicted in visual media. You can join the discussion here.

TED Talk: What does my headscarf mean to you?

Yassmin Abdel-Magied campaigns for tolerance and diversity. In this TED talk she challenges us to check our assumptions.

“The indispensable first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want!” –Ben Stein (lawyer, writer & teacher)

About Susan

Susan Hodge
Susan Hodge created Women Leading Together in order to provide seminars, workshops, and coaching circles to help career women move forward to create fulfilling careers. Visit our website at www.WomenLeadingTogether.com.

Copyright © 2015 Women Leading Together, LLC

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